Happy Spring! Ahhh, Spring....when a young man's fancy turns to prurient
filth, and a middle-aged one dreams of divorce. We'll be playing a 60
minute set this FRIDAY, 10:00 PM, APRIL 6th at NIAGARA BAR on the anally
accommodating Lower East Side.

Ya know, we're at the age when a lot of our pals are re-swimming the singles
sewer and asking the band to, uh...perhaps introduce them to some women who
might "help take some foam off the top", or conversely; gals inquiring "if
we know any nice guys"(!) Although we're solvent and nearly single, our
Caliguan activities have been lately neglected for efforts expended on
biologically accurate T-Shirts, live DVD, and finishing touches before a
late summer mix of our next album.

Still, we've found the solution: COME TO NIAGARA BAR! Gentlemen: Plenty
o' dollybirds pecking about....brush yer teeth, shave (on 2nd thought,
don't), flash some cash! Ladies: There's usually a few young fellas
flooping around that can pass fer hetero after 3 drinks and the obligatory
ignoring of the earring. 10:00 SHARP! We play fer an hour, then the DJ
spins some buttock swirling 80's muck and tattoos are displayed. What fun!!

Toilet Report: Previous reportings on this squattisserie remain unchanged.
Decent enuff early on, but things can get messy. However, there's a wee bit
of a loo in the downstairs Tiki Lounge where we play which no one seems to
know about that's currently accepting deposits.

FRIDAY...10:00....NO COVER CHARGE....BRING ID!